Ah, the relationship adventure continues into what can be the most challenging times, and, as with all the other times, not just with our teenagers, but everyone else in the home! This is the second time that our children individuate, that is, they continue to become their own person to prepare for adulthood. This presents its own unique relationship and communication challenges with all involved. And then our children become sexually aware and start driving and dating!
However, it does not need to be how home life with teenagers and then young adults is typically portrayed. There is a bad news – good news aspect to this development stage in that it is actually healthy for teens and young adults to talk back, push you to your limits, and pout. The good news is you do not need to get down in the mud hole with them; learn techniques to stay connected, let them learn from their mistakes, and not buy into their drama.
|Teen Relationships||Young Adult Relationships|
|Love & Logic™ when it is tough||Depression and anger issues|
|Sexual awareness.||Supportive role models.|
|The teen brain is really not chaotic.||New developmental milestones.|
|Peer and dating relationships.||Chores and allowances.|
|The second major individuation.||Cannot be too loving.|
|Family constellations.||Fostering independence.|
|Identity issues and role confusion issues.||Fostering intimacy not isolation issues.|